i believe

I believe in the sun
though it is late in rising.

I believe in love
though it is absent.

I believe in God
though He is silent.

-anonymous holocaust survivor – cologne, germany


2008, epic year

So as I was browsing friends’ facebook statuses the other day I noticed a few who were musing about how 2008 has treated them. This got me thinking about my own life and how 2008 has treated me. My main conclusion: 2008 has been an epic year for me.

The hugeness of 2008 started when I decided to take a leave of absence from school, and then began filling that time with other things: becoming pastor, starting a new job, leaving a job I’d had for nearly 5 years, and taking on several other new challenges. I also ended up moving into my own apartment, and except for a taking a sort of summer hiatus from dating, all year I was questing for a meaningful romantic relationship.

September 2008 was the first time in 24 years that I didn’t go back to school. It was a little weird but good. It is good because I have realized that I do want to go back to school and keep working on my goal of being a theology professor. I’ve been saying that I want to do that in the fastest, easiest way possible, and am slowly coming to terms with the fact that I may just have to take my time with it, I think I can be patient.

This fall was also epic in other ways. In September my parents were in a terrible car accident where they rolled their car off the freeway, very scary, I am still feeling so grateful that they are still here. In October I lost my maternal grandmother, Jean, who was an amazing woman and I miss her dearly.

And to end the year off nicely, after several failed attempts at trying to find a romantic relationship, I finally have found someone I can be completely myself around, who seems to understand me so well, who I am shockingly perfectly compatible with, and who I can trust – not to mention the bonus that for the first time in awhile I actually know that he likes me back, how awesome is that?!

So as 2009 brings in more new adventures – I’ll be teaching a grad school course for the first time for the first three full weeks of January – I find myself trying to catch my breath from a whirlwind year of change and risk. I look forward to more opportunities to learn to trust the chaos of life and the possibility for salvation in every moment.